http://mergespeaks.com/blog/">Turning Managers into Leaders

Back in March, I blogged about defensiveness as one of the tactics that negative people use to create toxicity in the workplace.  Stalling is another tactic used by negative people.  Their objective in stalling is to attempt to change a decision or control a situation. They may not want the assignment or project and, by stalling, they hope that someone else will take over.  If they put off doing what you ask them to do long enough, perhaps you’ll ask someone else.  And the unfortunate truth is that many times, just to be able to get things done, we let them get away with it!

So how can you overcome this?  Persistence and tenacity.  Involve these people by listening, really listening, to them.  Ask probing questions and be relentless in your follow-up.  Find out what the real reason for the delay is.  Don’t give up, you may have to ask several rounds of questions before you get at the real reason.  Once you find out, provide assistance and offer to help them, but don’t let them off the hook.  Determination and doggedness is the only way to combat stalling.

What do you think?  Do negative people resort to stalling?  And how have you dealt with it?  Add your comments below please.

P.S. here are some links to previous blog posts that addressed ways to deal with workplace negativity.

• Feed the grapevine
• Be inclusive when you communicate
• Let people talk
• Challenge extreme language

If you’re in a leadership position, then you know that it’s your responsibility to make tough decisions … but sometimes the changes that result don’t always sit well with your employees.  You certainly don’t want to alienate your team, but is it possible to communicate these unpopular decisions in such a way that your employees “buy-in” and negative responses are minimized? Absolutely!

And I can help! If you hesitate or struggle with delivering bad news, or if you’re unsure how to communicate unpopular changes to your team, then join me for one fast-paced and content-rich hour in which you’ll not only learn specific ways to communicate changes and decisions with openness and honesty, but also techniques to deal with negative employee responses.

Click here to register now

More than anything else, you need to be the boss that employees can trust, and I can show you how to develop and maintain your credibility so that you can create better working relationships and a more productive working environment.  And if you act by April 25, you can take advantage of early bird savings!

Here’s just some of what you’ll learn:

• Six specific techniques to formulate and deliver your message so that your employees see and know that you’re communicating with openness and honesty
• The one critical factor that will allow you to maintain credibility with your staff when the going gets tough
• Six proven strategies to deal with the negative responses you might get from your employees
• The well-known change response model, and how it gives you an insight into why people react the way they do when they are faced with negative changes
• How to rise above your own conflicting emotions – it’s hard to support and implement a decision if you don’t agree with it yourself!

Join me on May 2, 2012 at 11 AM MDT. Early bird pricing in effect ONLY until this Wednesday April 25!

Click here to register, or for more information.

There are times when you have to deliver bad news to your staff, or communicate unpopular decisions to your team … and let’s face it, sometimes those changes don’t always sit well with your people.  Ideally, what you really want is employee buy-in; but often you run the risk of doing exactly the opposite – alienating your team!  There’s no doubt, it’s a tough situation to be in!

And that’s exactly the topic I’ll be covering in my live Audio Conference on Wednesday May 2 in a program titled “The “Let’s Not Kill The Messenger” Manual – A Leader’s Guide to Communicating Unpopular Decisions and Changes”.  I’ll be opening the lines for questions, so I want to know —when it comes communicating, or sometimes even making, unpopular decisions or changes, what is your biggest challenge? What one thing could I help you with that would make the process easier? Go to www.AskMerge.com to ask your question and I’ll answer as many as I can on May 2.

And while you’re at www.AskMerge.com, be sure to download the free article — “Breaking Bad News: How to deliver unpleasant information with compassion and credibility” — in which I offer seven definitive things you need to consider.   Just click on the link on the bottom left of the screen.

I am repeatedly asked about strategies to combat negativity in the workplace.  And in the past I have offered several proven tools to resist or reduce workplace negativity (see below for links to past blog posts).  Today though, I want to focus more specifically on the people who are negative and the tactics they use to create a toxic work environment.  In reality, there are only a limited number of ploys that negative people use, and if you know what they are, you can be prepared to deal with them.  One of the tactics most commonly used by the Negative Nellies of the world is to become defensive.  It makes sense if you think about it: low self-esteem is a root cause of negativity, and so such a person will frequently take a defensive stance to “protect” himself from perceived attacks.  “Why is everyone always picking on me?” or “No one ever returns my phone calls” are common refrains you might hear. Read the rest of this entry »

Do you hesitate or struggle with delivering bad news to your employees?  You’re not alone!  In this article I offer seven definitive things to keep in mind to help you navigate this challenging leadership responsibility.

Breaking Bad News: How to deliver unpleasant information with compassion and credibility

What do you have to add to this list of seven?  Do you have approaches you use that you can share with your fellow blog readers?  Do tell.

I overheard two people the other day involved in an escalating discussion about who was more busy.  As one person complained about how much she had to get done, the other one vied to show how long his to-do list was.  Then he told her about the consequences of not meeting a work deadline and she narrated the terrible result of missing an appointment.  This went on and on, back and forth, for about 10 minutes.  I glanced over at my business colleague who was composedly eating her sandwich seated across from me at our small table.  She smiled, well aware that I had been unabashedly eavesdropping on the neighbouring conversation.

“I’d handle it differently,” she said, in response to my unspoken comment. Read the rest of this entry »

A few weeks ago, I gave you a short video clip about focusing on the problem rather than the person when giving negative feedback to your employees.  In this installment, I show you a way to criticize an employee while actually boosting the employee’s morale!  Watch the video below to find out how.

If giving negative feedback to your employees is something you struggle with, then be sure to also take another look at these past blog posts:

• Giving constructive feedback to employees – one powerful tip
• Giving negative feedback: focus on facts instead of opinions
• Giving negative feedback: stay future-focused
• Giving negative feedback: focus on the problem, not the person

So, let’s have a conversation about how you manage this challenging aspect of your leadership role.  Share your approach to giving negative feedback with me and others on this blog.  Just click on the Comment link below.

In the past, I’ve talked about how the the disparity between how fast we can talk and how fast the human brain can process information is a major contributor to poor listening (see Good listening: it’s about staying “checked-in”).  And if that wasn’t bad enough, there are all kinds of mental and physical barriers that get in the way of good listening as well.  So what’s a person to do, you might ask?  With the odds stacked against us, it is really possible to be a good listener?  The unequivocal answer is yes!

But listening, like any other skill, is one that gets better with use and practice.  If you play a sport of any kind, then you know exactly what I mean.  Let’s just say that your sport of choice is golf.  If you think back to the very first time you picked up a club and went out on the course, the chances are good that you didn’t play like a pro.  In fact, you probably weren’t very good at all.  But with practice, you got better!  And that’s exactly how it is with listening.  The more you make an effort at it, the more you focus on improving your skill, the better you will get at it.

Because I know that I am not naturally a good listener (I prefer to speak, after all ), I call myself a work-in-progress.  All that means is that even though I am not a perfect listener today, I am better at it now than I was a year ago, and a year ago, I was a better listener than I was two years ago.  You get the idea!

So what about you?  Are you a good listener?  What are you doing to get better everyday?

Giving negative feedback to employees is a task no one looks forward to. But, if you’re in a position of leadership, sooner or later, you’ll be called upon to do exactly that! So how can you be more effective? In past blog posts, I’ve shown you how to focus on fact rather than opinion, and how to emphasize the future and not the past. This short video illustrates one more tip to deliver the message in such a way so that other person is more likely to listen (and act) on what you say.

So … what are you saying or doing to increase that likelihood that the feedback you offer to others is heard and acted upon?

If you’ve ever had to pitch an idea or persuade others of your point of view, then you know all about the natural reaction that bubbles up from within when you hear the word “no”, or when others begin to question or criticize your perspective.  Instinctively, we tend to get defensive, and we try to immediately fight back and defend our position or project.  But in my experience, it’s actually far more effective to take a completely different approach – to ask questions.

The next time you face opposition or resistance, hold yourself back from verbalizing all the reasons why you are right or why your project should get the go-ahead.  Instead, ask a few well-chosen questions.  “Why do you think that?” or “What led you to that conclusion?” will force others to articulate their assumptions, and will not only give you a useful insight into where they are coming from, but may also cause them to re-evaluate their position.  I have found that asking questions  not only helps me keep my defensiveness in check, but perhaps more importantly, takes my conversations to a deeper level.  It allows you to get beyond the immediate disagreement and find out more about what the motivations are on all sides.

So have you found this to be true as well?  Please … share your experiences, positive or negative.